week 1 of second term is over...what would be really nice is a week-long break before tacking week 2....

my fixed practical didn't go very well...i wrote this one before writing 5 or 6 finals that went really well...so it's like a resurfaced bad dream... :( i was a little surprised, since my practice teeth were pretty good, checked by instructors without incident or much criticism, and so i was pretty confident. i suppose the lesson here is...well, probably there are several lessons. i suppose bad things can happen to anyone, there's one lesson. Two, you really can have a bad day. Three, overconfidence in anything is not a good thing. Four, sometimes you have to roll with the punches. i suppose it's just my personality - that simultaneously, i can and can't handle performing under par that well (it stresses me out to no end)...and i can only attribute it to always having done really well in everything, which was both expected of me by others, after a while, and expected by my own personal self. i remember the last time i had a terrible test result, when in second year of undergraduate, i took this physical chemistry course, and got exactly 50% on the midterm...there are other details like class average was similar and i emotionally and psychologically redeemed myself with an almost perfect final (which was probably made easy to bolster our marks - still, the psychological effect was transforming!)...but that night, when i my dad picked me up from the subway station, i started to cry in the car, and after i blubbered out why i was crying to my dad, he said i was stupid to cry over an exam. he basically said "do you have your health" (yes), "do you have your family" (yes) etc etc (yes, yes, yes), and then "that's why you don't need to cry over this". i don't want to overanalyze something that may have just been an off-day, but in the larger picture, what my insight from today is, is that every last bit of detail, every action, every consequence, cannot be anticipated nor controlled, and you should keep context and sanity by knowing that there are many things to be grateful for, in life. it's not as much in your hands as you think it is.

where to go from here...boy, would i like to see a friendly non-dentistry friend right now.
good read: The Purpose-Driven Life, by Rick Warren. it's a 40-day guide to developing a relationship with God, but it's very practical, and it very relevant to present-day life.

okay, back to the books.