sometimes, heaven up above, i wonder if i'll get through this year. my didactic marks have been better than ever, i'm chugging along in all the practicals, but throw a real patient at me - even though this person will miraculously and somehow show up in about three weeks from now (still lots of time!) - and i feel like i'm on the brink of losing control...

it's a strange predicament to be in, since my friends have always seemed to rely on me as the stable one, or the one who just happens to have a Q-tip or some polysporin or a bandaid or hair gel or a kleenex or a burrito or that last phone number in her handbag...i mean, i think i know what i'm doing, i'm sure i'll be pretty ready to look at plaque and calculus outside of the experience of the 50 clean mouths in my class. the turmoil and excitement and newness i feel whenever i walk into the main clinic is always surprised by how quiet and calm it always seems in there, even with maybe more than 50 student clinicians actually doing some dentistry.

okay, gotta sleep before i get zombie-like.